So much has been happening in my world. So many bloggable moments I have wanted to capture, but... Have you ever had so much going on that it seems like the days are running together and there is no separation. Has it ever seemed like you had no time to do anything, yet and still you are running around like a chicken with its head cut off?
Welcome to my world!
Somewhere (in there) last week, I got off track. I used to have a very strict schedule I stuck to. Well, not a schedule, but at least a bed time and wake time. I have found that I function best when I get the proper amount of sleep and when I arise before everyone else in this house. It seems easy enough, but it is challenging to get to bed on time when your husband seems to have made it his life's mission to make you miss your bed time! He seems to always have a way to sabotage my bed time.
Some of the ways he does this is by;
- Whining and complaining that we never watch Tv together anymore and begging me to lay on the couch and watch it. (even though the show is playing at a time that is clearly after my announced bed time)
- Coming up to our room, after I have already gone to bed, and complaining that it's too early for me to be in bed.
- Teasing me for going to sleep so early.
- Waiting until 25 minutes after my bed time, to request we have "special married time".
And before you begin to think that I'm going to sleep at 8pm... My bed time is 10:00pm! Yes, I try to get in bed by 10 and the above mentioned responses are made!
So last week, I gave into his plots against my bed time. And I was still trying to get up on time. That worked for a while, me staying up late like a rebellious teen, hanging out with my beau. But then I began to find it harder to get up in the morning. Then I began skipping my mandatory daily quiet time with God. Then all of a sudden I was operating on my husbands schedule and I was suffering for it.
Unlike him I CANNOT function on 4-5 hours of sleep a night. Or wake up one hour (or less) before work starts and have a good day. I just can't do it. I was tired, cranky and feeling less motivated. I really didn't know what was wrong with me. Then I got it! I realized I was not taking care of me. I was not doing the things which I know I must do to be at my best.
But no more! Last night I went to bed earlier and I was able to get up at a decent time, but still didn't get that quality devotion time in there. So from now I am not playing! I am going to bed on time tonight and I am getting up in the morning at my regularly scheduled wake time (Lord willing!). I already know my husband is going to try to prevent this from happening. But I also know what the results are when I give in to his antics!
Tonight I am going to bed on time, and I don't care what he says! (You hear me M?! I mean it!)
Can you relate to anything I've said here? Please share! And thanks for reading!
Sunshine Abuwi~
Hi Sunshine! I can definitely relate! It seems like it took my husband years to accept the fact that I am an early bird and if I don't get my sleep I am not a nice person! Finally after years I am able to get to bed at a decent time without him worrying me about something! :-)
ReplyDeleteBookeyqueen- YEARS?!?!?!? That's how long I have to wait?! LOL! Thank for commenting.
ReplyDeleteI think he may be coming around slowly.
I can more than relate. I have a great committed husband but he is on the narcissistic side where everything has to be about him. He does it unknowningly. He starts a fight about it and I have to give in sacrificing my God time, me time, my beauty maintenance time and so forth. At night i have been praying about it and the solution is that I have to schedule date nights once a week (even though this is impossible at this time). When we ever get a babysitter for our two kids we are going to have to schedule this and slightly force my husband to get used to not letting it be about him all the time. It is only going to all about him on date night. I have planned date nights to be jammed packed with tv movies, talking sessions, games, dinner, snacks, and so forth. So that I don't hear, "we never get to ..." Oh and schedules in my life are called outlines. They are do plans for the week or month, not for the day, lol.
ReplyDeleteCharisse- I hear you about making plans with a larger allocation of time for completion than a day. One thing that has helped me (a little) with dealing with my husbands desire to monopolize my time, is I had to become okay, personally with disappointing him. I used to always want to please him, but I see what pleasing him gets me. So when I know I need to take some time for me, I put my foot down and I completely okay with him being upset about it.
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting. Hope your date night works out!
I can relate as well lol I finally after years got my husband to come to bed with me and we get to have more time in the morning together :) We get up so rested and energized (and early) that I still get to have my devotional time and we even have time to sit and pray together! Once he started to see the time benefits it changed his attitude totally :) stand firm girl M will follow suit.
ReplyDeleteCandace- Thanks for commenting! I really do want him to get in bed earlier because I KNOW he will see how beneficial it is, BUT he works a lot and he says that he knows he should be in bed, but because he spends so much time at the office then when he is home he does not want to waste the time sleeping. :-( BUT sometimes, he will get in bed with me. I just have to remain faithful. Like when I am committed to getting in bed early,he begins to do it eventually, but then, I get weak and slip up and the next thing you know, I am staying up with him. So then we have to start all over again, like I am now.
ReplyDeleteBut your comment as well as others is giving me hope. Thanks!
You are so much more disciplined than I am. Both my husband and I think the same way as M. We come home ane spend so much time here on the couch with our laptops in front of us...we BOTH know we should get in the bed earlier. He can thrive off of a few hours of sleep..he'll still get up and run or work out...Me...not so much. We have grown a lot in our 11 years of marriage, though, because there was a time that I couldn't fall asleep without him, and he knew that...so he would use that to keep me up with him. As time has gone, though, I can sleep either way. You need to stand firm, though, Sunshine, you have goals and you have plans with you business...you know what you need to do to be productive in getting things done. When he sees how serious you are, he'll join you in bed early.:) Have a good evening...
ReplyDeleteTia- Thanks for saying that, " I am disciplined" cause I really don't look at like that. I just know that I am not good for anyone with little sleep and without certain things. Call me needy! Because I need sleep. I need alone time. I need exercise. I need to go to church weekly. I need to eat good food. I need to have spa nights. LOL! I have learned that I need a lot of different things in order to be balanced. I wish I could function like my husband, I would get a lot more done :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting!
I love your blog gives me a REAL insight at married life and that it is not easy to make it work on a daily basis but you have to be dedicated to your marriage as well as to you thank you for telling it the way it is. I tend to be like you i wanna please others often time forgetting my own well being. But i am realizing i can fully please others if im not in a good state of mind.
ReplyDeleteI am SO glad you enjoyed this post. I really do try to just be honest with my posting and with this blog I am really treating it as personal blog so I can document my journey.
DeleteI am learning the importance of taking care of me, like you said, we are NO good to anyone if we are neglecting self.
Thank you for reading and commenting.
Hi Sunshine..I happened to stumble across your youtube video "Keep looking ahead" and "Stop comaparing yourself to others" and I have to say you are a blessing. I have been beating myself up for so many years. I didn't like me for me and I always constantly compared myself to others. What you are doing is great. You are not just motivating women to go natural, you are motivating people to do better and to just accept themselves for who they are. Your video put me to tears. Thanks so much and keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteEvelyn
Thank you Evelyn! Your comment is so encouraging. I am humbled to know my videos are making a difference. Thank you so much for taking the time to reach out to me.
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